“A man who finds a wife, finds a good thing and received a favour from God….” So also, a woman who finds a good husband (partner) finds a good thing… It is a real blessing to find a good partner. A real partner or person is difficult to come by, especially these days… due to so many distractions, misplaced priorities and lack of self understanding as to what really a person wants or make him/her happy and be fulfilled.
A good and real partner is decent, has self respect, love him/herself and honest to him/herself; Expresses him/herself without fear, reflective, thoughtful and gracious. A real partner does not pretend to be perfect but acknowledge his/her limitations. A real partner recognize the importance of inter-dependence. He/she knows the true meaning of independent, as not arrogance or to conote liberty to do whatever pleaese him/her at the detriment of others, but as a prerequisite for interdependent.
A person who is not thoughful and reflective, will always be driven or influenced by others like a leaf that is blown in different directions, without knowing where it may land. A thoughtful and indepedent minded person will realize and know that he/she is responsible for his/her decision irrespective of his/her advisers.
Someone who is dishonest could lie or present manipulated description of issues to friends or advisers to shape the kind of advise (or suppport) they seek. You cannot blame your friends or advisers for outcome of your situation. A matured person takes responsibility for his/her successes and failures.
A real partner is becoming more and more difficult to find. Most people are influenced by the superficial world of deception, extreme selfishness and false imaginations. Love is no longer born out of deep feelings, but influenced by mostly what the naked eyes could behold. In essense, beware, love has been redefined in modern world – loving you for what you offer and very conditional. Don’t get me wrong, you don’t have to marry someone (everyone) you love, neither should you marry someone you don’t love. Living together requires more than love (though a critical factor), you need to be somewhat compatible to some degree and trust one another… It is a combination of chemistry (attraction), compatibility (include respect) and trust that ensure long term bonding.
Therefore to find someone who is real, you need to be real yourself. Otherwise, you will be lost in the world of false imaginations and perpetual deception. If you don’t know yourself and not real to yourself, you may find it difficult to identify and discover a real partner… because to the corrupt all things are corrupt. The pure in heart provides/offers the benefits of thought to all and treat all with uniquness they deserve… while not being naive, usually recognise a real person. To be loved you need the capacity to love. Even if you encountered a real person (who cares), you may not know or feel it, because you don’t know how to care or be real.
Knowing yourself is the beginging of your journey to a state of reality (being a real person and encountering or recognising a real person).